I graduated college back in 2002 with a BA in Interior Design and a minor in Art. You'd think I'd follow those dreams by staying within the field but I never did. No reason really... I ended up getting stuck in the retail world right after school which was short lived. Being young and naive at the time, I instantly hated the industry and felt that the lack of professionalism and hours were not worth a career in the field. Again, I was immature, unmotivated, bored and quick to make judgement. I obviously knew it all at 23 =)
So, I thought to fulfill my career requirements (great pay, set/scheduled weekday hours, weekends off, vacations, benefits etc)... is to work in the corporate world! Made sense to me at the time... and that's where I've been for 10 years.
I didn't have any experience so I started off as a receptionist but grew out of that position quickly by becoming an administrative assistant. I changed jobs many times because I didn't feel challenged.... even though I would take on project after project. After one position where I felt that my role turned more into a personal assistant, which is something I wasn't desiring, I landed a fantastic position at a prestigious company, managing events (event coordinator!!). Loved every minute of it and felt as though I found my calling. I worked around the clock, managed a group of interns, felt respected by sr management and people trusted me and my work. Perfect!
Then in 2008, I got laid off with my group. Want to talk about an emotional world ending feeling? It sucked! Luckily, I was hired back a few months later (never burn bridges people!) and into another executive assistant role with the company (comfort, right?). But the role felt like a step back for me. I worked hard to expand my experience and knowledge (and responsibilities) and once again didn't feel challenged. I then found a new position, internally, that was very scary, out of my element and way out of my experience. Exactly what I wanted... new challenge. I took a chance... and the group took a chance with me.
I had to really learn the finance industry (yawn) and took on major projects that require a lot of attention accuracy (compliance!?). It wasn't my dream job though... but I was happy with my day to day activities. Then once again (2+ years)... a round of layoffs took place but I was saved. However, my role changed significantly and I felt a bit lost. After 6 years with the company and many changes... I had to leave. It was time for me to go. So, I started to look for a job outside the company.
Because of my eagerness to leave (which btw I didn't need to rush!) I interviewed like crazy and had many amazing opportunities on my plate but decided on a position that really excited me! It was very different, out of my comfort zone and outside the city (yikes!). Still in the administrative field though. It was a huge step back and I knew I was overqualified but felt as though my experience would shine and grow even more in the new role. I hoped to be able to take 10 steps forward within a year. I felt it was the right decision.
However, my husband being the level headed smart man... had his hesitations. He thought I was taking on the position because I was excited to leave my current role and that I was blinded from seeing the bigger picture. He knew it wasn't the best fit. We actually argued a lot about it but in the end I took the role anyway. I was lucky to have his support. He is such a good man.
I instantly regretted the decision (sigh). Within a month I realized that I may have jumped the gun on this one. I never admitted this to Jim or a lot of people (not right away at least). I was actually content with the role and wanted to give it a chance. "I can do this for a year and take it from there" (so I thought). But the role opened my eyes a bit... actually, it opened up my eyes and my heart.
It made me question my life and my career. It made me start thinking about "what is it that I really want to do in my life". Is this it? Is this the path I dreamed about?
No...
No...
The 10 steps forward I was hoping to take was out of sight. I was going backwards... at 33 years old... I felt that the past 10 years were becoming meaningless. All the hard work I put into this 'career' was starting to fade. And I knew I was going to be 'stuck' if I didn't do anything.
On Monday, February 24, 2014, I quit my job and my 'career'... for good.
And I am scared out of my mind!!
....to be continued....
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